Honor. Kindness. A sense of justice. [ The ability to feel something other than self preservation. The answer feels simple enough. What makes a good woman? Many would have different answers, but Daenerys saw something rare – the same qualities as a man. ] I've known very few of them in my life.
[ it was an answer to a question that had many loopholes— honor for what? what justice? where was the kindness directed? there wasn’t much use in delving so deep, but it did make eren think himself, and of all the circumstances that would’ve surprised him. the same way there are assholes, and there are better people.
. . . he’d probably describe what is good in a similar fashion, aware that there was another side of the coin that was exactly like them. or they really are just shitty in character. those exist off the charts. ]
They’re hard to come by. [ he’s at half a glass already, and looks deep into it. ] Especially when you’re conspicuous.
[ Dany was not use to answering to anyone. Her will was a magnitude unmatched. Not Targaryen, not of dragons — but of Daenerys herself. It makes sense to her, why wouldn't it? Those who turn a wheel of oppression to those who can not crawl from underneath it — they were evil men. That is where her fire was always directed. ]
You should be humbled to know a good man created another good man, then. [ She knows not of his father, but if Eren claims he is good? The system is easy to surmise — Eren himself had been good to her. She saw no reason to claim otherwise. ] Please keep that tradition continued.
[ And she drinks heavily, the topic weighing on her. ]
he knows why, when his chest churns some at being called a good man. everything had become so twisted during the last four years, eren knows not where good even stands anymore. he was a killer. thousands of families and children crushed under the rubble of his collateral damage to usurp one trump card for himself. a manipulator, disregarding his father's feelings, taking advantage of a child and deceiving his own brother. the cause of hate not from only his own island, but friends and enemies across the globe. a thousand more would be gone when the rumbling succeeds. there was no undoing any of that.
but he'd still go out of his way to do it all again, if it meant that the cycle of oppression ceased and freedom be something all could grasp at equally. it's why he's grown so silent, his smile grateful, alas— melancholy. he doesn't know if he'll have the chance to even make that tradition continue through blood. he saw the end, scenery that had no words to describe— but then again, the last thing he saw was a firearm going off, aimed at his head.
. . . blood doesn't mean anything, in hindsight. if that sort of good continues in others, then he'll be happy. he'll have to keep moving forward to find out about all of that. ]
Maybe, [ he says as his next gulp is also a rather heavy one, throwing his weight forward to leave the wall he leans on, and reach for— a grape? five grapes. ] You said you had children, once.
[ please, tell him. he doesn't care if they're scaly, and regards them as if they weren't. ]
[ The sad reality is their work was unfinished. Good and bad — it was clear to her at times and then so murky at others. For her, Eren had done nothing but given her a confidence that she was not to fall victim to this world. To still hold true to what makes her Daenerys Stormborn of House Targaryen.
He grows silent, she grows silent. Her wine is chugged down, eyes shut and lips tense as she enjoys what little privilege that soothes her nerve. Just as being called a good man may be hard to swallow for him, the next topic he brings up needs to be swallowed down. ]
I did. My son did not live. [ Nor would any child bore from her womb. The topic was dear to her — a fresh wound that was buried beneath layers of ambition and self-preservation. ] However, the people of my world call me the mother of dragons. I did not carry them to term nor did I allow them to swell my stomach — but I bore three dragons from eggs long lost from my world. From funeral flame, I allowed them to hatch and grow to claim their right to continue on. Just as I claimed mine.
[ The topic was veiled in dramatics, so she speaks more clearly: ]
You understand why it is difficult to experience these changes knowing this now, yes?
[ oh he's just— hitting the bull's eye one after the other, isn't he. eren jaeger, good with people. the words nearly ice his gut, saved by the juice of crunched grapes between his teeth and a sip of remaining wine that forms a warm pool in his belly. it helps him take things with stride and steadiness, avoiding the consistent condolences that never truly make things better. it doesn't make him feel any less, but he has his own way of doing things. he's always preferred silence and true words rather than sorry, though that's just him.
he isn't a parent. but there always had been a pang when he thinks of his mother, thinks of his father, and thinks of when they had actually been together. ]
I don't think I can like you do. [ he admits, honesty the best policy, though— he has a feeling he knows on the surface like his own feelings show. filling his cup, he offers the jar for her as well, if she'll take him filling it for her. ] They're apart of you, aren't they?
[ Please fill her glass, goddamn this is heavy. There's a nod in his courtesy – respectful and appreciative. ]
They are. They were born the moment I was reborn. [ Birthed through fire and tragedy – to a world that was not ready for them. ] I miss them. My heart... calls for them and with each scale that pushes through my flesh, I feel they are here with me.
[ It's silly. She is at war with herself – the cosmetic changes unlike anything she had hoped for, but she was the dragon who brought change to the world. ]
But, it is not enough. My goal is to return home to them. Back to my people and the Kingdom rightfully mine.
[ And she gazes to him directly, as if cutting the conversation short: ]
[ it isn’t silly— who was eren to call any sentiment silly? he has, at least, empathy enough to resonate with her. not personally, but he can feel the palpable mourning in her voice and lips wet with wine. ]
I have to. [ eren puts his hand in motion enough for the drink in it to swirl along the glass edges. they share the same end goal, ] Even if I don’t know what’s waiting for me now. [ . . . there’s something she doesn’t know, that dawns on him, and it wasn’t the particular experience her had, but . . . a free claw drags down the root of his hair to split ends of black strands, pinching them between his thumb and index finger. ]
My hair growing wasn’t part of my changes. The mirrors still take us back.
[ His mention of his hair makes her tilt her head. A curious glance, one that she isn't quite sure what he gets out. It was not a disadvantage of her times, like her knowledge of a cellular / magical network. It was curious. She sobers more from the heavy topic, finding a renewed energy elsewhere. ]
Before going to Dorchacht, [ he begins, his claws tapping against glass, so lightly that for each tap— it felt as if they were hovering away bit by bit from the heaviness. maybe it was hope, or just a tremendous amount of more speculation— but it was something. his tone does not make it seem so simple, though. eren's glass is empty, but he decides to hold the remainder and wait it out through the rest of the grapes he collected. ] I was lured to the Looking-Glass House until I sat in front of my mirror, watched a year go by, then realized I was still here . . . In Aefenglom.
[ it's all . . . very awkward to explain, but he's trying his best. ]
[ It was difficult to understand things deeper than what they were dealing with. Her mind and heart both had to conform to the way this world works – her body twist and snap to adjust to a nature outside of her own. But, he speaks of something else. ]
What lured you? [ Was it dubious? Was it malicious? The next explanation does fall awkward and instead of sense, Daenerys grows angry. ] It was magic, wasn't it? Some witches spell cast and – I do not understand it. Day by day, things change and we change. There is no explanation and I grow so damn tired of waiting for something else to occur.
[ And now it's affecting people she actually has grown fond of? Eren beat her in transformations, no doubt, but – ]
The Mirrors were around hundreds of years before them. We might have reason to believe they came from Faes. [ at least . . . well. at least he does. ] We’ve been dreaming of them since day one. The dream in the forest, [ if she’s had that one already, ] isn’t any different.
It is different. The moment dreams have power is the day we can dream of whales soaring through the sky and gowns made of waterfalls.
[ Bitterly, she refuses these dreams. Her fate is in her hands. His words shake her a bit, and she downs her drink with a soft slam of her glass down. ]
If the mirrors have this type of power, why has there been limited exploration into them?
[ eren’s brows lift briefly and his head dips as he finishes the remainder of his drink, glass hanging from his fingers and keeping the heat of alcohol in his mouth for a hot second. it’s as if to consider . . . those may all be possible here. ]
It’s the leads that are limited, not the explorations. [ everything they’ve ever come across when it comes to them have been dead ends upon dead ends. ] I can’t shake the feeling that we’re being spoken to.
[ maybe because it’s happened to him before, but who knew. only if you get to the end, perhaps. ]
[ After everything, she still has trouble believing how far magic can go. It's been used to hurt her, but her own 'magic' – the one that allowed her to live through fire. The Targaryen magic burning through her veins like the dull ember in her chest... she is short-sighted. One part ignorance, one part bitterness. ]
You suggest some higher calling? [ His words feel as if there's a layer he holds back, something she doesn't quite understand. She approaches him more direct, her walls coming down a bit. ] Do you feel as if you're the same man who arrived here? Not with the changes grafted upon you, but here –
[ Her hand reaches to her own chest, where a very faint glow hums – the embers deeply rooted in her growing flame-sac always a dull fire. ]
Maybe something just out of our reach— it doesn’t mean we can’t get on the same level. [ he thinks, to then add: ] I don’t believe in higher powers the way most people do.
[ one would be surprised with what “gods” actually are. eren has come to the conclusion that their existences are always a figment of one’s imagination and a twisted vision of true stories long forgotten.
eren watches her come nevertheless, and regards the gesture with watchful eyes. if his own were to burn a flame, his throat would spark a brilliant orange and heat the scales of his collarbone to a kindle. he knows what she means, of course. that was one thing too many people, even his home, are quick to question. ]
. . . But I am. [ from years back home to months here. with the tips of his claws, he brushes against his own chest to mirror her. ] This hasn’t changed for as long as I can remember.
How do you believe in them? Many fear them, many worship them. I'm not sure where I stand.
[ She admits, as if she has elevated a bit beyond simply believing in a force that controls them all.
Daenerys feels some sort of kinship with him – a respect that eases her to be far more comfortable than she would wish to. However, a queen who trusts no one is as foolish as a queen who trusts everyone. Eren has earned this much. ]
Then... [ The hesitance is there, as if she's coming to terms with something. ] Perhaps the changes on the outside remain minimal in the grand scheme of everything.
[ again, with the good man business. it doesn’t hit eren heavily this time, as it did a bit on the first. perhaps it had been the fine wine, dulling his sensitivity and absorbing it in the warmth in his belly. yes, warmth there, spreading to his chest and warning him to be careful. the dragon inclines his head, sets his glass away for good, and behind him, damn it, his tail. it does a subtle bouncy thing, enough that he nearly steps on it to keep from moving around more than necessary. ]
You’re sure of yourself. [ it’s not a question, just a fond acknowledgement. he’ll take it to heart this time, and be grateful for it. ] I feel the same way, about you.
[ as for gods— ]
We stand with them. It only takes someone’s word to become a god, [ he gestures with his hand, held high and close to his face, ] or a devil.
[ another gesture, this time past his waist. he hasn’t met the one who calls him yet— but he has a feeling. through everything he’s learned and the predecessors before him, to even what had happened at home, with him. it was so easy for stories to twist out of proportion. because people see things very out of proportion. ]
I'm sure because I've seen bad men masked as good ones. I've learned to weed them out in a short amount of time, much like most of the challenges that rose against me.
[ She's confident that there's an allegiance that warms the tightening flame sacs in her chest, makes her cheeks warm with a flushed red that she quickly hides as she turns. ]
You offer good council and company, I appreciate both.
[ SIP, SIP. Her eyes finally look back to him when his words pull more otherworldly — gods, devils, and the like were something she did not practice or pretend to understand. ]
Then we must hope the devils we find here are not in power. I wish to return home, to my people and the path I march along. To my children. I will not be able to with them in my way.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
no subject
. . . he’d probably describe what is good in a similar fashion, aware that there was another side of the coin that was exactly like them. or they really are just shitty in character. those exist off the charts. ]
They’re hard to come by. [ he’s at half a glass already, and looks deep into it. ] Especially when you’re conspicuous.
no subject
You should be humbled to know a good man created another good man, then. [ She knows not of his father, but if Eren claims he is good? The system is easy to surmise — Eren himself had been good to her. She saw no reason to claim otherwise. ] Please keep that tradition continued.
[ And she drinks heavily, the topic weighing on her. ]
no subject
he knows why, when his chest churns some at being called a good man. everything had become so twisted during the last four years, eren knows not where good even stands anymore. he was a killer. thousands of families and children crushed under the rubble of his collateral damage to usurp one trump card for himself. a manipulator, disregarding his father's feelings, taking advantage of a child and deceiving his own brother. the cause of hate not from only his own island, but friends and enemies across the globe. a thousand more would be gone when the rumbling succeeds. there was no undoing any of that.
but he'd still go out of his way to do it all again, if it meant that the cycle of oppression ceased and freedom be something all could grasp at equally. it's why he's grown so silent, his smile grateful, alas— melancholy. he doesn't know if he'll have the chance to even make that tradition continue through blood. he saw the end, scenery that had no words to describe— but then again, the last thing he saw was a firearm going off, aimed at his head.
. . . blood doesn't mean anything, in hindsight. if that sort of good continues in others, then he'll be happy. he'll have to keep moving forward to find out about all of that. ]
Maybe, [ he says as his next gulp is also a rather heavy one, throwing his weight forward to leave the wall he leans on, and reach for— a grape? five grapes. ] You said you had children, once.
[ please, tell him. he doesn't care if they're scaly, and regards them as if they weren't. ]
no subject
He grows silent, she grows silent. Her wine is chugged down, eyes shut and lips tense as she enjoys what little privilege that soothes her nerve. Just as being called a good man may be hard to swallow for him, the next topic he brings up needs to be swallowed down. ]
I did. My son did not live. [ Nor would any child bore from her womb. The topic was dear to her — a fresh wound that was buried beneath layers of ambition and self-preservation. ] However, the people of my world call me the mother of dragons. I did not carry them to term nor did I allow them to swell my stomach — but I bore three dragons from eggs long lost from my world. From funeral flame, I allowed them to hatch and grow to claim their right to continue on. Just as I claimed mine.
[ The topic was veiled in dramatics, so she speaks more clearly: ]
You understand why it is difficult to experience these changes knowing this now, yes?
no subject
he isn't a parent. but there always had been a pang when he thinks of his mother, thinks of his father, and thinks of when they had actually been together. ]
I don't think I can like you do. [ he admits, honesty the best policy, though— he has a feeling he knows on the surface like his own feelings show. filling his cup, he offers the jar for her as well, if she'll take him filling it for her. ] They're apart of you, aren't they?
no subject
They are. They were born the moment I was reborn. [ Birthed through fire and tragedy – to a world that was not ready for them. ] I miss them. My heart... calls for them and with each scale that pushes through my flesh, I feel they are here with me.
[ It's silly. She is at war with herself – the cosmetic changes unlike anything she had hoped for, but she was the dragon who brought change to the world. ]
But, it is not enough. My goal is to return home to them. Back to my people and the Kingdom rightfully mine.
[ And she gazes to him directly, as if cutting the conversation short: ]
Do you wish to return home?
no subject
I have to. [ eren puts his hand in motion enough for the drink in it to swirl along the glass edges. they share the same end goal, ] Even if I don’t know what’s waiting for me now. [ . . . there’s something she doesn’t know, that dawns on him, and it wasn’t the particular experience her had, but . . . a free claw drags down the root of his hair to split ends of black strands, pinching them between his thumb and index finger. ]
My hair growing wasn’t part of my changes. The mirrors still take us back.
no subject
Explain. What do you mean by that?
no subject
[ it's all . . . very awkward to explain, but he's trying his best. ]
But my body grew as if I left. I felt like I did.
no subject
What lured you? [ Was it dubious? Was it malicious? The next explanation does fall awkward and instead of sense, Daenerys grows angry. ] It was magic, wasn't it? Some witches spell cast and – I do not understand it. Day by day, things change and we change. There is no explanation and I grow so damn tired of waiting for something else to occur.
[ And now it's affecting people she actually has grown fond of? Eren beat her in transformations, no doubt, but – ]
Allow me to guess: this Coven has no answers?
no subject
The Mirrors were around hundreds of years before them. We might have reason to believe they came from Faes. [ at least . . . well. at least he does. ] We’ve been dreaming of them since day one. The dream in the forest, [ if she’s had that one already, ] isn’t any different.
no subject
[ Bitterly, she refuses these dreams. Her fate is in her hands. His words shake her a bit, and she downs her drink with a soft slam of her glass down. ]
If the mirrors have this type of power, why has there been limited exploration into them?
no subject
It’s the leads that are limited, not the explorations. [ everything they’ve ever come across when it comes to them have been dead ends upon dead ends. ] I can’t shake the feeling that we’re being spoken to.
[ maybe because it’s happened to him before, but who knew. only if you get to the end, perhaps. ]
no subject
You suggest some higher calling? [ His words feel as if there's a layer he holds back, something she doesn't quite understand. She approaches him more direct, her walls coming down a bit. ] Do you feel as if you're the same man who arrived here? Not with the changes grafted upon you, but here –
[ Her hand reaches to her own chest, where a very faint glow hums – the embers deeply rooted in her growing flame-sac always a dull fire. ]
no subject
[ one would be surprised with what “gods” actually are. eren has come to the conclusion that their existences are always a figment of one’s imagination and a twisted vision of true stories long forgotten.
eren watches her come nevertheless, and regards the gesture with watchful eyes. if his own were to burn a flame, his throat would spark a brilliant orange and heat the scales of his collarbone to a kindle. he knows what she means, of course. that was one thing too many people, even his home, are quick to question. ]
. . . But I am. [ from years back home to months here. with the tips of his claws, he brushes against his own chest to mirror her. ] This hasn’t changed for as long as I can remember.
no subject
[ She admits, as if she has elevated a bit beyond simply believing in a force that controls them all.
Daenerys feels some sort of kinship with him – a respect that eases her to be far more comfortable than she would wish to. However, a queen who trusts no one is as foolish as a queen who trusts everyone. Eren has earned this much. ]
Then... [ The hesitance is there, as if she's coming to terms with something. ] Perhaps the changes on the outside remain minimal in the grand scheme of everything.
[ And confidently: ]
You are a good man, ser.
no subject
You’re sure of yourself. [ it’s not a question, just a fond acknowledgement. he’ll take it to heart this time, and be grateful for it. ] I feel the same way, about you.
[ as for gods— ]
We stand with them. It only takes someone’s word to become a god, [ he gestures with his hand, held high and close to his face, ] or a devil.
[ another gesture, this time past his waist. he hasn’t met the one who calls him yet— but he has a feeling. through everything he’s learned and the predecessors before him, to even what had happened at home, with him. it was so easy for stories to twist out of proportion. because people see things very out of proportion. ]
I just see people in the end.
no subject
[ She's confident that there's an allegiance that warms the tightening flame sacs in her chest, makes her cheeks warm with a flushed red that she quickly hides as she turns. ]
You offer good council and company, I appreciate both.
[ SIP, SIP. Her eyes finally look back to him when his words pull more otherworldly — gods, devils, and the like were something she did not practice or pretend to understand. ]
Then we must hope the devils we find here are not in power. I wish to return home, to my people and the path I march along. To my children. I will not be able to with them in my way.